14 Comments
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Martin Mc Carthy's avatar

Great pictures, and a great little poem to go with them. It had the beat, the rhythm, of some of Dylan's early songs, and I particularly liked the last five lines - especially this couplet:

"the tradewinds of uncanny servitude

bring sunrise as a broken interlude"

Keep up the good work, my friend.

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you, Martin, I'm glad you caught the Dylan feel. I now realize I was feeling it, too, but hadn't thought about it.

Carole Roseland's avatar

That cloud looks like a giant cruise boat. That would give me Kafkaesque anxiety. Nice pics and poem 😊!

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you, Carole. I love your cloud interpretation 🙂

Megan Youngmee's avatar

Absolutely loved this one

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you, Megan

Rufus McCain's avatar

The dizain form and your deft handling of it are quite satisfying. I like the minimal and/or idiosyncratic use of capitalization and punctuation in the series as a whole -- cutting against the formality of the fixed form for a rough-hewn feel. In this one, I love the handling of the Kafka and Shakespeare allusions (Hamlet and Gregor Samsa, what a pairing!) And the turn (volta?) that occurs at midpoem is deft and feels quite genuine. The happy ending feels real and believable. This series keeps surprising with how much emotional ground it covers in such small footprints.

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you, Rufus, I appreciate your catching onto the Hamlet/Samsa pairing and the volta.

Ronald Drimmel's avatar

Ah, really nice one Jonathan! Lovely.

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you, Ron

tidiial's avatar

This is so beautiful

Wendy  Gray's avatar

Oooh, I love this! Such a fabulous poem to parallel your photos! Powerful! 💜

Jonathan Potter's avatar

Thank you so much, Wendy